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meditation

Vågar du släppa kontrollen?

josefine bengtssonGiving the planner a break to create space for new adventure. Something that happens when I am managing to, just like a kid, throwing myself into something with trust, vulnerability, openness and playfulness.

 

For this to happen, I need to let go of control. I need to feel that it is ok, not to know what will happen next. That it is ok not to plan every single detail of my day, of my life. That it is ok that some moments are ”unproductive”. When I allow for adventure in my life, I allow myself to be alive.

 

Because when my life is a safe plan and every single spot in my calendar is marked, there is no time for adventure. No time for spontaneity. No time to flow. Actually, no time to live.

 

So today, I am doing my best to ignore that planner voice in the back of my head. Instead I am leaning back to open my eyes for what is in front of me.

Vad finns bakom rastlösheten?

josefine bengtssonIf I stop. Just stop. ✨

Putting the work aside. ✨

Turning off the phone. ✨

In silence. ✨

In stillness.✨

Alone. ✨

 

Allowing every single cell of my body to be in the restlessness. Usually, pain is showing up from behind. Tears will flow on my cheeks. Anger will heat my body. Fears will shake me up. Darkness will knock me down.

 

My whole being wants to run but if I am forcing myself to stay with that pain – surrendering to it – something else most often starts to emerge on an even deeper level.

 

The something else that gives me the sensation of connection, truth, love, being hold, and alive. Actually, the something else that gives meaning to my life.

 

So a key for me to be fully alive, is actually to allow myself to be restless. Of course, my first impulse, and what I have done most of my life, is to run away from it by working, teaching, exercising, controlling, being busy, starting a fight etc. But those times when I am managing to stay with it, and even allowing the pain behind to take me over, that beautiful something else starts to shine through every part of my being. So for me it goes, Restlessness – Pain – Aliveness.

 

How does it work for you?

Yogapodd: Yogiskt

josefine bengtssonWihooo! Jag har fått den stora äran att vara med i podden Yogiskt. En podcast skapat av två superkvinnor; Cecilia Humble och Jenny Andersson.

Wow, vilket härligt samtal det blev! Om närvaro, att komma ned i kroppen, att utforska sin smärta och att leva i yoga. Så inspirerande att få tala om yoga och meditation med dessa två fina kvinnor. Lyssna här.

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